feelings.....

I guess I knew the time would come when I would have to come home. I also knew that it would not be easy to say goodbye. I guess I just thought it would be easier for me to deal with, because I know that I will be back. I guess it just doesn't seem soon enough.

I knew that coming here, I would love it. I love the environment. I love the people. I love the language. I just love everything. Life here is very different from life back home, and I am not so sure that I am ready to come back. I like life here. Although right now life is a bit easy here because I dont have a job, if I would have been able to get one, I would have done it. I like working.

Working here is nice, because you at least get paid a fair wage. I would get paid more here to do the same sort of job (cashier) than I did back home. Substantially more. The average cashier here makes close to 2,000 USD a month after taxes are taken out. That's WAY more than the average cashier in America. It would be lovely to be making that kind of money. Granted, things are a bit more expensive here, but its worth it in the long run, because you get so much out of your tax money. I personally love their education system here. I also love their health care system. I don't suppose that many people would agree with me, but I think that for such a small country it works. Plus, with less people you have less people to take advantage of the system. I think that is one thing that I will love more when I am able to be a working Swedish resident.

I love how relaxed things are here. I have never really felt rushed, or stressed. At least I have never felt rushed or stressed like I have back home. I like the way of life here. I like the attitude that most people here have. I like everything.

 At first I definitely felt unsure if I was ever going to be able to adjust. Especially to the way that people shop for groceries here. And to operating at a lower volume.... because I definitely have learned that I am much louder than the average Swede.

But after being here for 4 months now, I can definitely say that I can adjust, and have adjusted, and I think I like the way they do things here better. I like walking to the store, or if its raining taking the bus. I now know that I can get used to it, although some days I do hate it. I can deal.

I think that since I have been here I have learned so much, and expanded my view on things so much. I also think that I really am meant to live here, rather than back in the U.S. I think that going back is going to be a big adjustment to me, because I am so used to the way things are here, and how much I like things here.

I've come to realize also that,  I don't think I will be able to eat certain basic foods (bread, and yogurt) when I get home, because after tasting them here it won't be the same. I think in general I have become a food snob since I have been here. Because I have cooked so many good meals, with great ingredients. I hope that I will be able to keep that up when I get home as well.

I dont really have much else to say. I just am a big ball of emotions, because I am not particularly ready to come back, but I am so excited to get home as well, to share my experience with everyone. I will have plenty more to talk about after this weekend I am sure.  I will be sure to try to post it as soon as I can, so that its posted before I leave, since next week is my last week here.

Sorry for blabbering on about how I feel, but I think that its kind of appropriate given that my time here is almost up, and I am kind of emotional about it, because I am conflicted about how I feel about coming home. Now that its all out, I feel better. That's all that I have for tonight. I will post possibly on Sunday or Monday, about this weekend.